Paul Blart, Mall Cop.
Prior to today's nomination, everything I really knew about Elena Kagan came from an article I read a few weeks ago about how it shouldn't matter whether she's a lesbian or not. So naturally the second I find out she's the pick, my reaction is to walk the world wide web for conclusive evidence on her sexual orientation. Way to fail that one, Slate.
Okay, okay, now you're making me feel guilty. I'll go read about her abortion stance or something...