Hazing

(originally posted at eclaircie.diaryland.com)

Okay, so I haven't written here in a while. In my house it's near impossible to get time on the computer and even nearer impossible to get time on the computer when people aren't reading of your shoulder. I can't write when people are watching; They sit there and correct you and comment on what you're writing and you keep on yelling "I'm getting to that!" Also, if there's anything more embarrassing than having people read things that you've written, it's having them read during the writing process. Because as awful as the final products may be, the drafts are far worse.

But anyway, I just have a little story to share in here for now. Perhaps it will remind you why it might not be such a bad thing that I haven't updated in a while.

I am innocently on the computer when Nate comes up to me. "Andrea, I've been eagerly waiting for you to get home because you're the only person in the world who will pull off all the dead skin on my foot."

And I readily agree. It will be fun. And I'll take extra time to clip and file his toenails, while I'm at it. And I also think about painting them because he would hate it, but not be able to do anything about it (with the cast, he can't reach his own feet, you see), but decide to be nice.

Anyway, I peel off all of this dead skin on his toes...and it's pretty gross, but also pretty fun. And I place all the skin on his knee while I go. Marsha comes in and I have a great idea.

Me: Hey Marsha, I dare you to eat a piece of this skin.

Marsha: Eww. That's gross.

Me: It's not too bad. Nate and I already did it.

Nate (who catches on quickly): Yeah. It kind of tasted good even. Like a potato chip, but limper.

Me: Come on Marsha, don't you want to be part of our club?

Marsha: Not if it means eating Nate's toe skin.

Me: But everybody's doing it.

Marsha: You guys both really ate a piece?

Nate: Of course. Matter of fact, I'm thinking about eating another in a minute here.

Marsha: Well...no. I can't. That's just too gross.

She leaves the room. And really great idea number two comes along. It is dinner soon. And I sit next to Marsha and put a piece of the skin in her food. She eats it, never suspecting a thing. After dinner, I walk up to Nate, say "Mission accomplished," and he just looses it. And then we're both laughing so hard. And the whole family wants in. "What's so funny?"

Nate: Well, Marsha, we need to tell you something....You've now joined the club.

Marsha (looking at her empty plate, then at me): No! You didn't!

Me: I'm sorry...it was just such a good idea.

Nate: But wait! There's more! Not only did you join the club, but, actually...you are the only member.

And then a spontaneous wrestling match breaks out between Marsha and me, which somehow evolves into a spontaneous dance-off. And all is well.