(originally posted at eclaircie.diaryland.com)
Ahh...sibling rivalry..
Me: Listen...your ACT score may be a point higher than mine, but that doesn't mean anything. I mean, let's look at who got a John Phillip Sousa Award and who didn't in this family.
Jared: Hey...all I have to do is kill off Greg Bergeman and I totally have a chance at one myself, don't be so quick to judge. And let's recall who went to Mathcounts and who was just an alternate.
Me: Ohhh...low blow. I knew I should've killed Tony Viet when I had the chance.
Jared: Well, as long as we're killing people, maybe I'll just kill off several people and be valedictorian this year. You could never beat that.
Me: Well...I probably would've had to kill off less people than you to become valedictorian...take that!
Jared: No fair! West Side was a smaller school!
Me: You know what, I'm sick and tired of this insubordination. I'm older, which means I'm better. End of story. Plus, I'm going to punch your lights out once I get home.
My roommates: I've never heard Andrea so violent before.
Me: Hey, this all started with him saying Mr. Conaway liked him better than me. We all know that's a false, cruel lie. He deserves whatever's coming to him.
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